Make a list of the ultimate NEEDS you require in your life partner. These are things that you cannot live without. Then make a list of the WANTS you would like in your life partner. These are things that you would like him or her to have but could manage if they didn’t have. If you would like to divide them up further into the “Fundamental Five” types of connection feel free to do so as well. (Intellectual, Emotional, Spiritual, Chemistry, Lifestyle)
NEEDS | WANTS
List specific ways in which you would like to improve yourself, regarding your relationship tendencies. Under each item list the specific ways HOW you would like to go about doing this. Be specific.
Example:
GOAL 1: I want to be less judgmental and more open to the men I date
a) notice my own insecurities that make me feel the need to judge
b) try to be compassionate and understanding towards other people’s experiences
How do you think your relationship role models and your relationships with your parents have influenced your current relationship tendencies? What are the tendencies that you would like to improve? (Examples of common tendencies: guarded, judgmental, needy, never satisfied, avoidant, not deserving of love etc.)
Think of your relationship history, write down any relationships or potential situations you can think of (Who, when, what happened, how did it end up, etc.). Review this history and see if you notice any patterns or tendencies.
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