I came across this short video from Bigthink.com and thought it was relevant considering how much Facebook has become a part of common culture, and the new movie “The Social Network” just came out (which I saw yesterday). I agree with Tal Ben-Shahar in that, although there are tremendous benefits of having this phenomenal platform to connect with the rest of the world, our own deeper sense of self can be challenged….
By spending energy on “externalizing” we can end up spending more time focusing on how we are being perceived, than actually paying attention to what is going on inside us. Also, the tendency to compare and judge (and stalk!) is increasingly amplified with access to all of these photos, which inherently doesn’t add to our true happiness. When we compare ourselves and our lives to the fun, sweet, exciting moments that other people portray on Facebook, we aren’t even comparing to a full reality. We may look at fabulous moment or a picture in someone else’s life and compare it to the entire scope of our lives and feel bad. Or on the other hand, we may compare and judge the other and feel better about ourselves temporarily. When in truth, the need to compare and judge others as a means to feel good about ourselves, might be the real thing to be giving some attention (click here to learn more about doing that).
On another quick note, one thing I found most interesting about the movie, is that the kid who made Facebook didn’t have any true friends, and he was creating a platform to facilitate “surface” friendships…just food for thought.
I just read this article from Women’s Digest: UCLA Study on Friendship Among Women. Here are some of the highlights that I found interesting…
“Women respond to stress with a cascade of brain chemicals that cause us to make and maintain friendships with other women…”
“Scientists generally believed that when people experience stress, they trigger a hormonal cascade that revs the body to either stand and fight or flee…Now researchers suspect women have a larger behavioral repertoire than just fight or flight…When the hormone oxytocin is released, as part of the stress responses in a woman, it buffers the fight or flight response and encourages her to tend to children and gather with other women instead.”
“… the “tend and befriend” notion developed by Drs. Klein and Taylor may explain why women consistently outlive men.”
“…study has found that social ties reduce our risk of disease by lowering blood pressure, heart rate and cholesterol. There’s no doubt, says Dr. Klein, that friends are helping us live longer.”
It seems that the sharing and bonding amongst women is even more important than I realized….just another good reason to make an appointment with me I suppose 😉 Click here
“You Can’t Stop the Waves, But You Can Learn to Surf” -Unknown
Many of us get caught up in the waves of life, trying so hard to control them and make them stop while almost drowning in the process. Although it takes some effort to relax, step up on shore, and accept the fact that we’ll never control the ocean, it actually gives us the opportunity to take some surfing lessons. (Which makes life much more enjoyable in the long run!)
Ready to “surf ” with me? 🙂 Click here